“boys don’t like a girl with dark lipstick"
"boys don’t like a girl with short hair”
“boys don’t like a girl with too many piercings”
“boys don’t like a girl who doesn’t take pride in her appearance”
I D O N O T C A R E
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How dare you exist for reasons other than pleasing men.
Someone come cuddle with me so I can play with your hair, run my fingers up and down your back, give you sweet little kisses on your cheek and forehead. And we can make some stupid jokes together and laugh all night
what im here for:
little girls being allowed to cut their hair short and wear comfortable clothes so they can roll around and play. little girls never being asked about their theoretical “boyfriends” and not having the idea of having a boyfriend thrust on them. little girls having crushes on their best friend whos a girl and being able to be open about it. little girls being allowed to be themselves and be comfortable and be little kids.
I will wear what I want.
I will get tattoos if I want.
I will wear makeup if I want.
I will dye my hair if I want.
I will pierce whatever I want.
I will shave what I want.
I will lose weight if I want.
I will gain weight if I want.
I will have sex if I want.
Stop telling me what to do with my body because I’m a girl.
I am sorry if I don’t have a clear skin. I am sorry if I don’t have a sexy body. I am sorry I don’t have that hair goals. I am afraid I will never be able to achieve the modern definition of beauty. I am afraid I will never be able to fit in. I am sorry I am not beautiful.
(A girl who do not possess what everyone wants, 2016). (via reasonality)
list of little things sexual abuse survivors can do to make their body feel/look less like the one that was abused:
-change your hair. even if you can’t afford to dye or cut your hair, try parting it a new way or changing how you style it. hair makes a big difference in your looks
-change your hair “down there” too. if you normally shaved are are able to, stop shaving or make a new style. this makes your genitalia look less like it did when you were abused
-change your underwear/external clothing if you can. this can be too expensive for some people so i you can’t revamp your wardrobe try making little changes like adding jewelry if you can
-do tons of self care and body exploring. try to look at yourself in new angles. spend some time in the mirror if you’re able to. notice some new things and learn to love and appreciate new things. even if you’re not ready to for physical attributes yet, try to appreciate your heartbeat and how strong it is or even your breaths and what they sound like.
-try new sensations on parts of your body they touched if you’re able to. like if they grabbed your arm and you remember it, touch that place softly with silly material or with your fingertip. show yourself that your body feels different things and their physical marks aren’t permanent
your body is constantly changing. your abuser(s) didn’t really know you and you can become unrecognizable if that helps. just remember your body isn’t the same one they saw
Love this!
Some more ideas:
-Experiment with how you wear makeup, including nail polish
-Change how you trim your facial hair, if applicable
-You can put on temporary tattoos (or go all-out and get a permanent one) to change how you look, to cover your body in something beautiful, and to also have positive reinforcement to not take your pain out on your skin
-Change what perfume, after wash, deodorant, or lotion you use. Though it won’t change how you look, providing yourself with different sensory experiences of your body by changing how you smell can help your brain realize that this is now, not then.
-Change what kind and color/pattern socks you wear. This is much cheaper than changing an entire wardrobe, and it can be very helpful when attempting to use body-based grounding techniques.
””“”“why did you cut your hair?::”“”“” i cut my hair to piss you off. specifially you, i was thinking of you when i cut my hair. i was thinking that you, specifically, would be interested in what my newly short hair meant to you, specifically.
if someone u know dyes their hair, do not dO NOT under any circumstances tell them u liked their original hair color better???? and do not say “i can see ur roots” like wow no shit, hair grows and that happens! congratulations on being an ass
theamitysofar